Saturday, November 19, 2005

Fuck you. Shut up.
"I'm not sure why it was worded that way," he said. Fuck you, too. Is it possible, can there be some way --now put your thinking caps on -- to get someone in charge of FEMA reconstruction efforts who might have a wee drab of management experience? Night shift at Wienerschnitzel, alternate days at Photo Hut, maybe a former assistant district produce manager at an Arkansas Piggly-Wiggly? Anyone? Think, boys, think! Hmm. You know, now that you need a note from the Pope to declare bankruptcy in this country, I wonder what's going to happen to the hundreds of thousands of people without homes and jobs once the banks and the credit card companies start coming after them? Debtor's prison? Pound O'Flesh? Or do we just shoot the poor fuckers? I know! They can apply to FEMA for an extension! (makes jack-off motion) DOI DOI DOI. Since when did HUH WELL THAT'S NOT RIGHT I WONDER HOW COME HUH become an acceptable response from people who fuck up and cause untold billions in property damage and kill hundreds, if not thousands, of people? Why does the media let them get away with WELL GEE I COULDN'T TELL YOU IT'S SURE NOT WHAT I TOLD THEM TO DO? Well, shit, I'm on deadline, better run with it! P.S. to Ivor: How's that media hardon holding up, Hoss? Annnnd here's another one. Fourteen, two, none, I don't know why you yammering little bitchtits are getting hung up on details. This is listed under "Business" on the Advertiser's website. Some chick draws Harry Potter fan art, publishes on web, holy God stop the presses. Dig that broomstick, too. I didn't know Harry was part Airedale. See, here's why I still hate the Daily: 1) The artist used to draw Snape with a goatee, until she saw Alan Rickman in the movies, so now no goatee. But Kayla Gagnet assures us immediately afterward that "Wack's drawings are her own vision..." 2) Further, this vision has been shared with "millions of fans all over the world through the Internet." Take a pill, lady. Her fan art page shows about 200,000 visits. The whole thing is so staggeringly banal ("The first character she drew was Headmaster Dumbledore, but Wack says she liked drawing good and bad characters equally") that it's almost disorienting enough to make one forget one's original query, which is who the hell thought this was newsworthy in the first place? Does Bill Decker play Halo with this girl or something? I don't mean to pick on Alice; I think fan art is retarded, and although I myself used to create elaborate superhero drawings and realized WHEN I WAS NINE that I needed to concentrate on original art and subject matter, she does appear to have some drafting talent. So good luck with the, uh, stuff. (Poke around Alice's website and you can find some devestating Katrina images, too.)


Anonymous Kevin P. said...

"I have a very vivid imagination, and I like to get it down on paper,"
GRRRRRRRR ... ARRGGHHHH ... How can you have a vivid imagination when Harry Potter is already an illustrated character and you're ripping off scenes from the movies and books? Kayla Gagnet is such a groupie that she wrote a Potter article some time ago and actually allowed it to include a picture of herself dressed like a character. It's too bad 'cause she's actually pretty good-looking. Just wait 'til poor Alice has to go job hunting with a portfolio full of nothing but Harry Potter drawings. I feel a jolt of reality coming on for her.

11/20/2005 08:37:00 AM  
Blogger Ian McGibboney said...

I actually know Kayla, and she's pretty cool. Sometimes I wonder if the stuff she writes isn't unfortunately forced upon her. In this case, though, I don't think it was. But the issue here is not with her writing, but with the subject of her article. In fact, I think Kayla did a good job by leading off with the quote about the goatee. That's very telling about the artist's supposed "imagination."

Kevin, you are absolutely right about the imagination issue, and in fact took the very quote I was going to cite to make that point. I've known so many excellent artists over the years, but their very downfall was that they lacked the imagination to do anything other than fan drawings. Harry Potter didn't get to be famous because J.K. Rowling spent her time writing intricate Hardy Boys fan fiction.

11/20/2005 12:11:00 PM  

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