Saturday, August 27, 2005

To my New Orleans readers: if you were thinking of staying home and riding out Katrina, don't. GET OUT. Last year, I was worked a hurricane planning workshop in Baton Rouge, put on by the state's Department of Homeland Security. It dealt with planning and response to a major SE Louisiana hurricane, complete with simulations and expert-designed projections, surveys, etc. A Cat3 making a direct hit on NOLA was projected to cause massive damage, far beyond what the average person might think. Consider the possibility of 18 feet of water in the CBD, a toxic soup of household and industrial chemicals floating around the flooded bowl that NOLA sits in and substantial, if not complete, destruction of homes and businesses along the river. Think floating corpses and balls of fire ants and gasoline and god knows what. If you stay and survive, search and rescue will not come after your ass for some time, and if they do they will be coming to take you out and nothing else. After they blow the levee and the water goes down, it'll still be months before the city is livable. Casualties possibly in five figures. That's a Cat3. If Katrina makes landfall as a Cat5? The destruction will be apocalyptic. Get out now.

Wednesday, August 24, 2005

Reposted so it stays on top: I was hoping to keep my personal life out of this blog, but I need a job. I have substantial experience in publishing, graphic design, writing, editing, and publication/creative management. Email me for a resume. Freelance accepted but full time is preferred (insurance costs are phenomenal). Help a brother out.
Bring it on. Oh, and after you bring it? Suck on this. Oh for Christ's sake. Someone send this carnival mind-reader a high school biology textbook. The comments take care of him pretty well, but you can see Pharyngula for a frogmarch through reality. Speaking of unreality, Pat Robertson says he was "misinterpreted."
"I said our special forces could take him out. Take him out could be a number of things including kidnapping," Robertson said on his "The 700 Club" television program. "There are a number of ways of taking out a dictator from power besides killing him. I was misinterpreted," Robertson added. Robertson, the founder of the Christian Coalition and a presidential candidate in 1988, said on Monday of Chavez, one of Bush's most vocal critics: "If he thinks we're trying to assassinate him, I think that we really ought to go ahead and do it."
He blames it on the Associated Press. Lying little turd. Don't let him walk away from this. Don't let any of them walk away from shit like this any more. Also, dig this: Pat's business partner in his offshore gold mining business is (was? Will check later) Charles Taylor, famed tyrant dictator of Liberia. And it gets better: seems that Taylor has been fingered for funding al-Qaeda. (Scroll down.) Pat, Pat, Pat. Aiding and abetting the enemy. Tsk. Well, so much for John McCain. I liked McCain, I really did. I might have even voted for him. But I refuse to throw away a vote on anyone so stupid or spineless as to pimp for intelligent design.
I was hoping to keep my personal life out of this blog, but I need a job. I have substantial experience in publishing, graphic design, writing, editing, and publication/creative management. Email me for a resume. Freelance accepted but full time is preferred (insurance costs are phenomenal). Help a brother out.

Tuesday, August 23, 2005

A lot of the tightie righties get all prickly when the left refers to them as "The American Taliban." "Ridiculous," they sputter. "An unfair, insulting comparison." O RLY? Here, pull this one -- it plays jingle bells. Pat, Pat, Pat. My goodness. You know, I hate people who say they hate to say they told you so. I don't mind a bit: I and others of my left-leaning secular persuasion warned you all years and years and years ago about Jim (Payday Loans) Baker and Jimmy (Just touch it) Swaggart and Oral (Gimme a quarter or God's gonna break my ankle) Roberts and Pat (I can change the path of hurricanes) Robertson and Jerry (fags and feminists are to blame for 9/11) Falwell. We all warned you. But no. Come on, say it with me. "Moral Majority." How does that taste now, sitting in your mouth like coughed-up turd? That's a great picture of Pat up there, isn't it? "As soon as that camera's off, he's gonna fuck that little dog!" I like this, from Wonkette:
Pat recently called for someone to assassinate Venezuelan president Hugo Chavez. A controversial move, to be sure, but we had no idea that Christianity was like some massive multiplayer game where could just take people out.
For more Robertson wisdom go here. Here's a golden oldie from Jerry Fallwell. 54% of Americans polled now think that the U.S. made a mistake by sending troops into Iraq.According to President Bush, that means that 54 percent of all Americans support terrorism. I can't even get mad about this whiny schoolyard bullshit any more. I've grown used to hearing "Patriotic" right-wing Republicans smear anyone who opposes the war, deride and mock the military service of decorated veterans who oppose -- or even question -- the war, and insult grieving gold star mothers, calling them whores and puppets and traitors. I just accept that's how righties are these days. I don't want to conflate right-wingnuts with all Republicans or even all conservatives, but hey, if it walks like a duck, lies like a duck, and smears like a duck, it's probably a Republican duck. Keep it up. Keep insulting and lying and squealing and smearing and calling us terrorist sympathizers. Your political obliteration over the next four years will be legendary.

Monday, August 22, 2005

New comic is up. Still too groggy to make much sense of the news, but here's a screen grab from the Cincinnati Enquirer from a few weeks ago: Okay, never mind: here's the debonaire Bill Decker on Intelligent Design. I suppose I shouldn't expect much from the Daily, but I still do. I expect a community newspaper to be a guiding force and an example. I expect it to look behind the noise and find the truth, or at least get as close as it can. But the Advertiser has failed for years and years and years in the most basic functions of a newspaper: from incompetent editing to refusing to cover the Catholic Priest sex scandals of the 80's to waffling, moronic editorials like this one. Can you tell what Bill's opinion is? Can you even tell which thoughts are his, which are restatements of another's idea, or which are sarcastic? Here, try:
The argument will be over intelligent design. The concept is based on the idea that nature abounds with organisms and biological processes that are far too complex to be explained by Darwin's evolutionary accidents. The possibility that an intelligence designed the physical world can't be ruled out and may even be probable, scientifically speaking. Therefore, intelligent design should be taught in schools along with evolution. At least.
Even when I can tell what I'm reading, it's enough to give me a custer headache:
Darwin's natural selection says plants and animals with useful biological processes succeed. These processes evolve over eons by accident, recombination, mutation, whatever.
Yeah, by "whatever." This is not hard, you know. Successful traits don't evolve by "accident" or "recombination" (I think Bill remembers the word "recombinant" and knows that it has something to do with genetics, so he just threw it in there, because otherwise I have no fucking Idea what he's talking about); successful traits evolve in response to environmental pressures, Turtle didn't go through other options before arriving at shells; it wasn't some blind, groping effort. Ad don't get me started on that stupid goddamn mousetrap bullshit. Does Michael Behe think that the mousetrap just sprang fully formed from its inventor's forehead? That there were no prototypes, no failed experiments, no refinements over time? And if you take away some of the parts, what you have left surely *is* a mousetrap; it's just a mousetrap that doesn't work Oh god where's my medicine. (MOOD: DIGITALIS) Well, I should know better than to expect reason and insight from a newspaper that prints stuff like this on the editorial page. I don't have much to say about this. I know John Copes and have always liked and respected him, but I have to say this is just dumb. And kind of sad; if the Governor's Office or the Louisiana Democratic party thinks setting up some kinds of Tokyo Rose-cum-Mod Squad blog (oop, bad word!) is going to change any minds or effectively respond to Republican smears ... I just ... and written by staffers? Really? You thought that would work? By the way, has anyone found out which little weasel leaked this? In other news, whore. I had a professor who once told me that he wished I would use "the scalpel as well as the lash" when engaging in criticism. I thought about that for a long time, and decided that, while the scalpel is a fine and necessary tool, some people don't understand anything but the lash. Some people don't deserve the scalpel. So it is that we come to another condescending editorial about how immature and shrill the left is, with fabricated and/or out of context quotes from Cindy Sheehan, tossed-off ignorance like this:
The Sheehan Left wants swift withdrawal from Iraq, whatever the consequences. It wants Democrats back in power. It can't wait for another election; and it still believes that something was rigged about the last one. When you read the anti-war blogs or a New York Times columnist, you get the sense it actually wants Iraq to fall apart, or al-Qa'ida to regroup, or another terrorist atrocity to succeed. Hurting Bush is the overwhelming, empowering imperative.
and a fascinating refusal to acknowledge the plummeting poll numbers of the president and the chorus of protesting voice rising around the country. It's not a mass movement yet, but it's not just hippie radicals and pinko-com-symps. But not according to the Australian: it will be the grown-up, measured and sensible Republicans who will lead us from this mess and WIN the War on Terrorism! Nigga, please.

Saturday, August 20, 2005

Some say TomAto, some say toMAHto. Then again, others may say it defferently. And that's just all part of this wonderful rainbow crazy quilt of freedom we call these here United States. If you can find a more pussified editorial this weekend, I'd like to see it. Phone and cable companies still deathly afraid of municipal networks. I have a personal interest in this, as I supported Lafayette's municipal fiber proposal and hate Cox Communications so bad I could fart nails. I'm still pissed off about the SCOTUS's eminent domain ruling, though, and am not particularly in the mood to cut municipalities any slack when they're fighting off corporate meddling with one hand while jiggling some developer's balls with the other. OH WHY DOES LIFE HAVE TO BE SO COMPLICATED. Fracas? Does anybody really say "fracas"? "Yeah, me and Lurleen went drinkin' over t'the Wagon Wheel and she caught the slut Brandine with her hand down Dace's Wranglers and they had them a fracas right there by the video poker." Anyway, something ought to be done about that endowment or that foundation or what have you. I bet they spent it all on booze. This is all that goddamn Cheney's fault. Darth Vader? Are we offering our middle schoolers the option of joining the Dark Side as a "lifestyle choice? I blame George Bush! Via 2Millionth: A link to a scathing editorial by Paul Begala and a smattering of right-wing hatred to brighten your Saturday:
Chelsea is a Clinton. She bears the taint; and though not prosecutable in law, in custom and nature the taint cannot be ignored. All the great despotisms of the past - I’m not arguing for despotism as a principle, but they sure knew how to deal with potential trouble - recognized that the families of objectionable citizens were a continuing threat. In Stalin’s penal code it was a crime to be the wife or child of an ‘enemy of the people.’ The Nazis used the same principle, which they called Sippenhaft, ‘clan liability.’ In Imperial China, enemies of the state were punished ‘to the ninth degree’: that is, everyone in the offender’s own generation would be killed and everyone related via four generations up, to the great-great-grandparents, and four generations down, to the great-great-grandchildren, would also be killed. -- John Derbyshire, National Review, 2/15/2000
The Political Teen (please) weighs in on Intelligent Design. It's turtles all the way down, kid. "Volunteering to become a soldier is volunteering to preserve and protect - with your own power and will - the country, its borders, its citizens and its institutions. It isn't volunteering to keep a political party in power."Jack Cafferty says "Fuck it." Via Digby: Rose Aguilar interviews regular red state folks in Stories in America:
I feel like the president is doing everything he can to help. Like what? For one thing, he is protecting our country by being in Iraq. We can't pull out too soon because they'll think we're chicken and they'll try to attack us again. W
But there's anger, too. A lot of anger:
What'd you do? I was a building inspector for an insurance company. I made a nice living for a quarter of a century. When you get laid off, it's a big shocker. All of a sudden, you got no money coming in. If you're in your 50s and 60s, they're not gonna hire you to do anything. They won't even hire you to sweep the floor. People laid off my age have to get two or three different part-time jobs. What are you doing now? I do part-time building inspections and my wife went back to work as a teacher. Without that, we would have lost the house. Do you have health insurance? I get it through the VA and a clinic in Tulsa. If it wasn't for that, we'd get sick and just stay home and hurt. Or die.
And, from the same guy:
You're not a fan of Bush? No. I was lied to in Nam and he's lying to the people about the Iraqi thing and the oil thing. The Gulf of Tonken was a lie. Weapons of mass destruction was a pure lie. Young men and women are dyin' for nothin'. Afghanistan was a righteous cause. We should have sent all these men and women over there and gotten bin Laden, cut his head off and come home. Did they? No. We're over there losing people for nothin'. Eventually we'll pull out of that country and it'll be total anarchy anyway. Bush is popular in this state. Yeah, unfortunately. Big oil is around here, so sure, he's popular. He'll lie and people will believe him.
There's a change in the weather coming. A storm from the north. Can you feel it yet, your bibled-up chickenhawk cocksuckers?

Thursday, August 18, 2005

Amazing database of North Korean Propaganda. The Poorman presents Keyboard Kommandos Komix. For whining pussyfart hippie agonistes over the cartoon, go here. I find it particularly offensive that all the "respect the dead" Sheehan bandwagon-jumpers are getting their panties in a bunch over this. I don't recall liberals being so humorless, and I don't recall quite this much forced, bleeding-heart empathy and deep concern coming from the left, at least until it became clear that the right wasn't losing much sleep over 1800 dead. How many memorials did you "offended" people go to before Camp Casey started up? How many of the dead have you personally mourned? Give me a name. I can wait. Fucking hippies. A veteran's message to Larry Northern. Keep it up.Keep going. That's the kind of effort I'm talking about. You guys keep this kind of pace up, and you'll all have dug your own graves by November. With any luck.

Wednesday, August 17, 2005

From Kos:
Quotes from when Clinton committed troops to Bosnia: "You can support the troops but not the president." --Rep Tom Delay (R-TX) "Well, I just think it's a bad idea. What's going to happen is they're going to be over there for 10, 15, maybe 20 years." --Joe Scarborough (R-FL) "Explain to the mothers and fathers of American servicemen that may come home in body bags why their son or daughter have to give up their life?" --Sean Hannity, Fox News, 4/6/99 "[The] President . . . is once again releasing American military might on a foreign country with an ill-defined objective and no exit strategy. He has yet to tell the Congress how much this operation will cost. And he has not informed our nation's armed forces about how long they will be away from home. These strikes do not make for a sound foreign policy." --Sen. Rick Santorum (R-PA) "American foreign policy is now one huge big mystery. Simply put, the administration is trying to lead the world with a feel-good foreign policy." --Rep Tom Delay (R-TX) "If we are going to commit American troops, we must be certain they have a clear mission, an achievable goal and an exit strategy." --Karen Hughes, speaking on behalf of George W Bush "I had doubts about the bombing campaign from the beginning . . I didn't think we had done enough in the diplomatic area." --Senator Trent Lott (R-MS) "I cannot support a failed foreign policy. History teaches us that it is often easier to make war than peace. This administration is just learning that lesson right now. The President began this mission with very vague objectives and lots of unanswered questions. A month later, these questions are still unanswered. There are no clarified rules of engagement. There is no timetable. There is no legitimate definition of victory. There is no contingency plan for mission creep. There is no clear funding program. There is no agenda to bolster our over-extended military. There is no explanation defining what vital national interests are at stake. There was no strategic plan for war when the President started this thing, and there still is no plan today" --Rep Tom Delay (R-TX) "Victory means exit strategy, and it's important for the President to explain to us what the exit strategy is." --Governor George W. Bush (R-TX)

Tuesday, August 16, 2005

PWNED! The last two lines make this fabulous bad review break the bonds of earth and approach the divine. Holy crap.
I can't get all riled up over Cindy Sheehan one way or another; obviously, I grieve for her loss, and I strongly support her right to do what she's doing. But I can't honestly believe that she thought a camp-in would get her an audience with His Nibs, and I don't think she's going to end up being the new leading figurehead of the anti-war movement -- or at least, she won't remain so after summer vacation is over. So I think it's great that she's out there, I think it's great that she's getting support, and I think there isn't a chance in hell that she'll get what she wants, and I think she knows that. This is a symbolic act, not the locus of a new revolution. Something that has surprised me about all this is the venom with which the right has attacked her, from Malkin presuming to speak for Sheehan's dead son and digging into her divorce proceedings (click here and here to see some equally venomous responses to the woman who once wrote a book defending internment camps) to O'Reilly calling her "insane" and "treasonous". Or maybe that was Limbaugh. I can't tell them apart. I've noticed, with grim amusement, the recent habit of certain rightists to denigrate, mock, and smear the military service of any soldier, dead or alive, active or retired, who dares to hold a leftist line, from John Kerry's Swiftboating to Casey Sheehan to Paul Hackett. This is going to backfire, you fuckheads. In a big way. It's already backfiring. Michelle, for example, completely misses the point about the asshole who drove over the memorial crosses set up near Sheehan's camp. She responded by asking why liberals weren't outraged about several instances of pro-life cross farms getting uprooted. That's vandalism too, and nothing to commend. But the interesting point about the vandalism in Crawford is that it's coming from God-Fearing Right-Wing conservatives, firing warning shots in the air and mowing down memorials to fallen troops. That's what America sees: little white crosses, all torn down, while Bill and Rush and Michelle call the rest of us traitors. Support the troops. Cindy Sheehan won't convince the country to throw the wingnuts on the dustbin of history: they'll do that themselves. Here's a decent summary of the whole Sheehan mess from a conservative blogger. And before anyone brings it up, not that it's relevant but holy Christ who knows how you people think, here is a short and sweet debunking of the story about Hillary Clinton snubbing a group of Gold Star mothers.

Monday, August 15, 2005

Ghaaaa:
Once, in the spring of 2001, I was invited by then-Senate Majority Leader Tom Daschle to address the Senate Democratic caucus. I outlined the three digital divides facing the Democrats: The fact that Republicans were outspending them on technology and out-organizing them... The fact that Democrats were voting against bills to increase spending on broadband infrastructure, which was like voting against a subsidy for their own base--since it's the less well-off who are less likely to be online... The fact that no one was thinking about measuring the technology quotient in any piece of legislation: Would this program be made obsolete by new technology, could it be enhanced, etc... Here are two responses I got. First Senator Dianne Feinstein raised her hand and said, "Senator Daschle, the Internet is full of pornography and pedophilia, and until that's clean up, I don't think the Senate should be on the Internet." (And she represents Silicon Valley!)
By the way: this blog resides at both this blogspot page and is syndicated to my website. Readers of the website may wish to note that they can comment on an entry by loading the blogspot page (click "blog" in the top navigation bar).
Nola.com: NewsFlash - Mitch Landrieu redoes office, official residence for $955,000. That's reasonable. I mean, you can't get a spiral staircase and state of the art kitchen appliances for much under a cool mil these days. I'm sure it will provide a much more professional image when Mitch meets with ... with ... What does Mitch do again? New laws in effect today. New laws are introduced each year in order to keep legislators on their toes. It's like moving up a level in a video game. Please note that
Another measure taking effect today is House Bill 242 by Rep. A.G. Crowe, R-Slidell, requiring a woman who becomes pregnant by rape or incest to request spiritual counseling before having an abortion. It also requires the abortion provider to advise her of alternatives to abortion, such as adoption, but waives the 24-hour waiting period before having the abortion performed. It still requires the waiting period for other pregnant women.
It requires rape victims to request spiritual counseling? Put it in the freezer! By Christ, they'll never look in the freezer! Matt Frawer, in case you've forgotten, was Edwin Edwards' lawyer during his last star-crossed trial. Tangipahoa educators attempt to learn. Doomed, doomed. They're just now trying to get up to speed on the laws they've been accused of ignoring for years, and it's all just the biggest fuckin' surprise to everyone.
"It's very obvious that everybody from the top down wasn't aware of the small print and details of the consent agreement," School Board member Sandra Bailey-Simmons said. She said she believed the agreement addressed prayers only at games and graduation ceremonies, and would never have signed the agreement if she had known it might restrict prayers under other circumstances.
Oh okay. Well, since you didn't bother to read the legal document before you signed it, we'll just tear it up and start over. $#(@)*%^%#@^$# Fuck this shit. I mean really. Fucking killer bees now. WHAT HURRICANES AND GIANT ROACHES AND SERIAL KILLERS AND AL COPELAND AIN'T ENOUGH? Killer fucking bees. That's just perfect. Able Danger Whiskey Tango Foxtrot. What a bunch of maroons. Ashcroft too? Fingers crossed. Background at the author's blog, here. C'mon, fatboy. Don't let them take you alive. This can only end in a shootout at a run-down motel just outside Bent, New Mexico. James Dobson quotes an unpublished manuscript by "the foremost authority on the prevention and treatment of homoosexuality" on curing your son of the gay:
Meanwhile, the boy's father has to do his part. He needs to mirror and affirm his son's maleness. He can play rough-and-tumble games with his son, in ways that are decidedly different from the games he would play with a little girl. He can help his son learn to throw and catch a ball. He can teach him to pound a square wooden peg into a square hole in a pegboard. He can even take his son with him into the shower, where the boy cannot help but notice that Dad has a penis, just like his, only bigger.
Don't read the rest if you have high blood pressure.
New comic is up. Gibberish here later today, I hope.

Friday, August 12, 2005

Please bear with me for a couple of days as I switch feeds for this blog. Should be all set by monday.